Holy Christ! My Teeth are so white!
I finished my seven day teeth whitening system. And fuck a nut bag, my teeth are white! Shit yeah! Damn. I can walk up to any lady and give her a big shit eating grin, and she will love it. She will look in awe upon the glorious white bones protruding from my gummy gums. She will know that I have passion, and she will want to taste that passion. For she will know my mouth houses white sympathetic teeth, teeth that can sooth her soul, teeth that can shake her to her knees. She will lust for my incisors and beg for my bicuspids.
yet i fear.
i fear she will see my yellow molars. For the advanced whitening system (the very same that dentists use) did nothing for my molars. Alas, if she glimpses my stained "grinders" the romance may be lost, and my white shining spell, defeated.
AH, I forget myself. My canines will make the woman tremble in ecstasy. Molars be damned! My incisors, canines, and bicuspids are enough to woo any woman!
Excelsior!
posted by Old Stallion at 11:55 PM
3 Comments:
i was always especially fond of your eyeteeth.
yo Dan. did the whitening make your teeth ache? I heard whitening makes teeth ache.
Yeah right. Some "whitening gel" is going to cause me pain? HA HA HA HA.
I mean, shit. Maybe if the "whitening gel" was Draino. I felt no pain sister, but only the bliss that comes with knowing one's teeth are whiter than fuck.
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